Wassup you morons!
Welcome to my humble abode! You know what, I have a very important topic to discuss today, YOU, yes YOU! The ugly looking teenage wimp who is staring at the screen right now. Now take a good look at yourself. C’mon, do it!
Now, that you have observed this useless creature, which is YOU (in case you didn’t get that coz YOU are such an idiot), here is the time to come straight to the point. I am pretty sure, you think that you are the most tormented soul ever to land on this planet and life has been a sadistic bitch to you over the years! Well, I got news for you, YOU SUCK!
The reason I am using such a sugar-coated dialect because there is one thing you need to understand for life. The TEENAGE YEARS are going to be the best years of my life. What? Don’t believe me! Alrighty, I will make sure that you agree to what I just said. You must be thinking who the hell am I to say so? Well, here is a list which covers up all your petty problems.
1. Acne: BITCH PLEASE! Really? You think this is a problem?
2. First day at school
3. Breakups
4. The distance between your bed and your bathroom
5. Being the only one in your friend circle who is not in a relationship.
6. Parents: If you think your parents are a problem then just close this window and never ever visit this website again. I am damn serious. I will track you down and punch you in the face and then help you get up and punch you in the face AGAIN.
7. Homework
8. Pocket Money
9. Getting rejected from your crush
10. Friends
Convinced? Ah! Darn it! I don’t give a rat’s ass if you are not! In the coming months I will come up with my experiences as a teenager to tackle these problems. You know where to look for that information. DUMB ASS, come back to WHACK IT UP for more.
You stink!
~ Mr. Whacko Jacko
Whack It Up 